GIVE is one of the 5 Ways of Wellbeing and is the one thing that costs nothing and can make a huge difference to the wellbeing and motivation of self and others. 
Demonstrating gratitude and appreciation is scientifically proven in Psychology Today, Forbes, Harvard Health and Positive Psychology who regularly write articles about the positive impact being grateful and giving can have on our physical and mental wellbeing.
Today is World Kindness Day as well as Friday 13th 2020!. 
I wanted to share some ways in which you can GIVE and support those you care about,  who may also be running a small business and finding the current pandemic and lockdown a real challenge and needs some inspiration. 
1. Write a recommendation on Linked In - If you have had an interaction with someone and they've made a difference to your life of business then share with the rest of the connections your experience. Here is a link to my profile and reviews that I'm grateful to have received and given https://www.linkedin.com/in/claire-cahill/
2. Leave a google review - A great opportunity to share the experience that you've had with an individual or organisation and these really help businesses get noticed as they move up the google ranking to page 1. If you've never done one before then reach out to the business owner, I'm sure they would be delighted to send you their link. I've currently got 10 reviews which has given me great insight and allowed me to engage further with the people who have given me them. Here is my link so you can see what people will send you https://g.page/accendo-coaching-training/review?rc
3. Leave a book review on Amazon - These all help the potential reader get a feel for the book that they will be purchasing and help the author remain higher on the list when readers are searching for topics. When authors get the reviews they provide valuable insight. https://amzn.to/38DXCtK and https://amzn.to/3kuLAFc
4. Send Random Acts of Kindness - I've sent copies of my books to potential clients or as a thank you gift or birthday/Christmas gift, I've also sent my branded scented candle which was designed and produced by Jane Helliwell at Scent Styling Company to clients whom I've worked with for a period of time as a thank you for making an investment and trusting in the coaching process. It's also really special when you receive things in the post, examples of gifts I've received are clotted cream fudge, a peace lily, flowers, prosecco, thank you cards, gift vouchers, the list is endless when you start to think about it. My children have also made cards which they have then sent to family and friends or left in library books for the person who reads the book to receive. 
5. Provide Feedback - This is a gift, which when accepted with open arms can support personal growth. I have clients that frequently ask me for open, honest and constructive feedback that enables them to improve. This empowers them to be their best self which supports their mental wellbeing. It also opens up the conversation further to allow them to give me feedback which supports my personal growth. We all have blind spots and it's helpful to raise awareness to the strengths as well as potential pitfalls. 

On Monday 23rd April 2020, the UK found themselves in the middle of the Covid-19 world pandemic, resulting in the government implementing a lockdown to help save lives and prevent unnecessary pressure on the NHS. We continue to be asked to follow the government guidelines of only going out for necessities ie food and medication, to not travel unless it is essential, however we are allowed to exercise daily to maintain our physical and mental health and wellbeing. Social distancing must be implemented though when we go out which means we must stay 2 metres apart from everyone unless they are part of your family and they live with you. 
With these challenges and restrictions in mind how have you been keeping active?
Here is the list of top 10 activities that me & my family have completed or want to complete and continue to include in our daily routines.
1. Walking - On average we complete 5000 steps per day and the goal we've now set is to increase this to 10,000 steps per day.
2. Bike Riding - My husband, Martin and my eldest son, George are exploring lots of new places, woodland and waterways being out on their bikes for approximately 30-60 minutes every other day. The challenge now is to get me & my youngest son, Henry out on a bike!
3. Virtual karate class - George normally attends his karate class every Thursday & Saturday totalling 4 hours per week plus travel time so being able to complete 3 classes per week for 40 minutes a class via zoom has been a fantastic alternative to maintain his skills.
4. Football in the garden - Not quite the same as 3 times per week for Henry, however every day he is practising his football skills and shooting in the goal.
5. Cricket in the garden - This has taken me back to family holidays as a child where we used to play cricket at the side of the caravan, on the beach or in the park so being able to throw a ball and hit it has been great. We've just had to be mindful of the windows on our house and our neighbours!
6. Running - I used to love cross country and long distance running as a child so now is a great opportunity to get me from couch potato to 5km and it's not that I don't know anyone who could help & support me because one of my coaching clients, John Cannon is only a phone call away aswell as the option of a downloadable app, so what's stopping me?
7. Badminton in the garden - I have been watching my neighbours play this and occasionally I'll throw the shuttlecock back over the fence. We have a badminton set in the garage so now is a great opportunity to get it out and compete with the neighbours over the fence.
8. Dancing & Exercise DVD - I love dancing and as a child was always in the studio, I can even remember some of the tap routines. I also used to complete an exercise dance DVD twice a week in my living room saying to my brother in law "I will get a Kylie bum even after children" where did the motivation go?
9. Riding a scooter - Henry went out on his scooter when we had a walk to the shops and on the way back he was busily eating an ice cream so my inner child burst out of my body and I rode his scooter. It was hilarious and we have video footage too. I didn't realise how much vibration comes through the handle bars depending on what surface you are riding on.
10. Virtual Yoga - I once attended a pilates class and really struggled so never went back, however now I am practising being more present maybe now is the time to try again so that I can strengthen my core.
What are the activities that we are missing during the lockdown?

• Swimming which also included walking to the healthy living centre
• Playing in the local parks on the swings, slides and climbing frames
• Football matches and training

These are the questions that I now need to answer and invite you to do the same as part of our reflection time.

• How many of these activities will we carry on in the 'new norm'?
• How much money are we saving by choosing virtual options?
• How has our wellbeing improved by completing these activities daily?
• How can we make sure we continue to build these every day activities into our new norm?
• What activities have you been completing?
• What else would you add to the list?
• On a scale of 1-10, where would you rate your current 'be active' on the wellbeing wheel.

Please email claire@accendocoaching.co.uk for a copy of the wellbeing wheel which was originally designed by Debbie Inglis as part of our 5 Ways to Wellbeing workshop

We find ourselves in turbulent times with the outbreak of Covid-19 (Corona virus) and it has been fascinating to watch how the UK has responded to the crisis. 
 
I have a personal view that we are all leaders and it is how we choose to behave in these turbulent times that demonstrate the leadership skills we all have. 
 
There are days where I feel we are dammed if we do and dammed if we don’t. The opinions of others across the world over social media and journalists are impacting the decisions that individuals make, which cements my belief we are all leaders and have leadership traits which many will choose to follow.

• What would happen if our choices and decisions came from a place of love rather than fear?
• What would happen if we collaborated rather than competed?
• What if we all worked as a team rather than in silo?

 
These are questions that are relevant now, in the future and questions I’ve asked in the past as part of reflection.
 
What lessons am I taking away by leading through crisis?

• Challenge creates opportunity
• Our values drive behaviours
• Our beliefs drive behaviours
• Tough decisions must be made based on risk
• Fear and panic creates hysteria
• Communication is paramount for success
• Love and support creates harmony
• Collaboration is the only win/win situation

 
None of this is new, we just don’t consciously bring it to the forefront of our minds when we are busy. 
 
What opportunities does crisis bring?

• Learning & Growth
• Creative Thinking
• Strategic Thinking
• Implementation of new ways of working
• Teamwork
• Effective decision making
• Living life true to our family and company values and beliefs
• Challenge and conflict resolution
• Effective Communication

 
How is the current crisis affecting me & what am I doing about it?

• Home schooling – great opportunity to learn and connect with my boys to truly understand the challenges that they face in education and how things have changed or stayed the same within the education curriculum. 
• Effective Communication – being clear about the plan of action for the day. What the priorities are and valuing that we all give and receive information differently. Sometimes I must provide more information than I would normally like to receive and appreciate that others will process this information differently. They may want to be quiet and digest the information rather than talk about it aloud. 
• Getting creative – clients can still be coached over the phone and where they prefer face to face then embrace technology and utilise facetime and zoom. Explore what elements of my training programmes can be delivered online and learn the systems to educate myself and others
• Utilise my support groups – I’ve had more conversations with people over the phone, email or social media than ever before to seek to understand how I can help and support them as well as them helping and supporting me. A true example of collaboration over competition. 
• Remaining positive – I regularly talk about my emotional bank account and whether it is in credit or overdrawn. The more we give praise, support, words of encouragement and inspiration the more positive effect it will have on everyone’s mental health and wellbeing.
• Home working – whilst I am now used to home working, the dynamics at home will change so we will need to play to strengths in our family team and understand the roles that we all play throughout the day, respecting the fact that we will all have different priorities to achieve and how can we make sure the deadlines are achieved.
• Basic needs of survival – food, water, heat & security. I haven’t gone out panic buying, believing that if we all continued buying our weekly food as normal there will be enough for everyone. I have clean running cold water out of a tap as well as warm water for a shower. In other parts of the world, people would give anything to have that. I have a roof over my head that is safe, secure and warm whilst there are people still living out on the streets wondering when they will next have their basic needs of survival.

 
All in all, I have a lot to be grateful for. My health which is my wealth, a family who love and support me even when I’m not firing off all cylinders and being my best self as well as a fabulous support community that I can pull on in times of crisis. I’m living life true to my family and company values and beliefs.

• How is the current crisis affecting you?
• What help & support do you require?

 
Please feel free to reach out to see what solutions I may have at claire@accendocoaching.co.uk. Thank you for reading this blog and let’s lead the way

International Women’s Day 2020
 
Sunday 8th March 2020 is International Women’s day and 18 months ago, Joanne Outram & I collaborated with 10 other women to bring ours and their stories together in a book titled Inspirational, Fabulous and Over 40.
 
I want to recognise these amazing women by giving you a snippet of their journeys.
 
Jane Dyer – A lady faced with a disability from birth who has never let this get in the way of success. In fact, she is determined to succeed no matter what and embraces the challenge of her situation by working with people who are in similar situations and demonstrates that through her business, Tudor Rose Business Services, where she provides her clients with solutions to their problems by being able to walk in their shoes “Empowering YOU to focus on YOUR dreams”. 
 
Debbie Inglis – I’ve known Debbie for the last 7 years and have the privilege to be an associate coach for her through her company Square Two. She lives and breathes her brand because Square Two is all about not going back to square one. Her chapter is called “Mentally Tough Me” and her story clearly demonstrates this as she shares her 7 learning points of her “Life CV”. If you asked her if she was “Mentally Tough”, her response would be “I’m working progress” which I think we all are.
 
Sarah Jones – The co-author that has not yet reached 40, however found her courage to “Break the Taboo” and follow her passion from being a brain surgeon to a self-employed funeral director! What a shift. I totally resonate with her journey of leaving a safe and secure environment with a regular income and final salary pension scheme, dealing with the challenges of others thoughts and feeling whilst knowing you have the support of those who love you, willing you on to live your true purpose with passion. As she says “If you never risk more than you are willing to lose then what is the worst that can happen?”
 
Katy Mason – I met Katy when we both started our coaching journey in 2011 and I smile when I read about “Chaos the chimp” because we all have one that sits in our head that triggers our thoughts, feelings and behaviours. Sometimes this chimp can be helpful other times it can be a hindrance. Thankfully Katy has found “Anotherway” to help herself and her coaching clients move from “Middle of the Road to Loving Boot”
 
Ali Moore - Ali certainly “Finds her roar” as she shares her emotional story. The driving force being to learn to “trust” again. I love her mantra of “Dream more, See more & Be whatever you want to be!”. It’s good to talk and when the going gets tough, don’t be afraid to reach out for help & support to “Reconnect” with that is important in your life right now. 
 
Michelle Oxley – The title of Michelle’s chapter “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” is so true as she shares her life of abuse resulting in turning the highly confident, full of life woman into a woman full of self-doubt, low self-esteem and lack of self-worth. Thank goodness she found the light and has gone on to huge success in her business and been a role model for her family.
 
Sam Parsonage – I’ve had the pleasure of working with Sam for many years and see her grow on her transformational journey. She “dares to be different” and I was so proud when at 50, she chose to follow her passion of vintage and sell pretty dresses in her own shop “Miss Samantha’s Vintage” which turns 2 later this month. 
 
Sally Penni – At the time of publication Sally had just turned 40 and what a difference she has made during her lifetime. A barrister of 20 years fighting the cause for others brings a sense of achievement and justice to those deserving of her time, energy and effort. Sally is a professional woman who fights for the rights of her clients whilst recognising there are people in the world less fortunate than her that she can help, support and inspire along the way which is why she raises money for charity and decided to donate all her proceeds from this book to Anthony Nolan and Royal Manchester Children’s hospital. “Whatever your dream, Every Penni counts” was a great title for her chapter and she is certainly living her life on purpose.
 
Janet Woodjetts – I’ve had the pleasure of knowing Janet for the last 5 years as part of the 3 Shires Coaching group and every interaction that you have with her is “with love, fun and gratitude”. As a proud baby boomer, she shares her challenges throughout the decades and the selfless actions that she took to be the role model that she is today to her children, stepchildren and their partners who now inspire her with their courage, knowledge and humility.
 
Lynnda Warsnop – A science teacher, who like so many became burnt out and stressed by the job. Lynnda was brave to take voluntary redundancy so she could support her son with his challenges. By doing so she realised she was “by myself, but not alone”. The power of building a team has been her success throughout all her career especially as a self-employed woman who frequently has the support of her “sparkling ladies” as part of “The Sparkling Business Club”
 
Joanne Outram – A hugely talented and determined woman who has learnt the hard way about the “numbers losing their crunchiness” and in the process found the “Law of Attraction”. Jo now works with women to educate them on their money mindset and from my personal experience can honestly say it’s been life changing. When the going gets tough the tough keep going and that’s what Joanne has certainly done.
 
Claire Cahill – What can I say about myself that you don’t already know? I’m determined to succeed no matter what. Impossible is I’m possible and failure is not an option, it’s just an opportunity to learn and grow. I have my Mum & Nana to thank for the woman I am today because without them I wouldn’t be where I am today. Continue to “Dream, Believe, Achieve and Make it Happen”
 
If you have enjoyed this blog and the snippets of information I’ve shared about these truly Inspirational, Fabulous women who are over 40 then head over to Amazon where you can read their full stories on kindle or contact me at claire@accendocoaching.co.uk where you can purchase a signed copy of the book for £10

These are the leaders and coaches that leave no stone unturned, they will make sure all the i's are dotted and t's are crossed. They have fantastic attention to detail and the more detail they have, the more they thrive. If you give them an action plan they will make sure you have every eventuality covered. These qualities are great if you are expecting a visit from an auditor, however imagine being in a meeting where you want to move forward with an action plan and the compliant C keeps highlighting the risk, being cautious and sitting on the fence afraid to make a decision in case it is wrong.

General Characteristics of a compliant C

• Reserved - thinking things through internally
• Task Orientated
• Cautious
• Compliant
• Calculating
• Careful
• Enforce the rules
• Evidence based decision making
• Analytical

Their greatest fear is criticism due to their perfectionism and will avoid conflict like the plague. Your intention may not be to criticise or pick fault, however being a reserved individual who processes every detail they will take any form of feedback as potential criticism due to the high standards that they set themselves. 

They say that opposites attract and can work exceptionally well together. I know that a lot of my clients are compliant C and we have a fabulous relationship because their strengths are my development needs and vice versa so we end up being each others missing ingredient. I can think of numerous jobs as a leader and a coach that I would gratefully delegate to a compliant C and they would thrive and flourish seeing through to completion. On the flip side I know that I would only be able to tolerate their need for more detail for so long before I would get frustrated. 

Part of building effective relationships and having powerful conversations is recognising your own personality traits, accepting them (warts and all), deciding how you best like to receive information and be able to articulate that as well as respectfully realising that you may need to adapt your communication style to get the best out of others and the relationship. 

Questions to ask yourself when working with a compliant C

• How do they make you feel?
• How would you have to adapt your communication style to get the best out of them?
• How will they help or hinder your relationship and team?
• How will they be an asset and add value to your team?
• What would be the best environment for these people to work in?

My top tip for engaging with a compliant c is GIVE ME DETAIL, the more the better and consider your INTENT & IMPACT.

For further information about DISC and the personality traits I can recommend you read "Do it or Ditch it" by Bev James and "Empowering Employee Engagement - How to ignite your team" by Claire Cahill. Both available on Amazon

Steady S leaders and coaches are the organisers in the team. They will have a plan and see it through to the end, some people will refer to them as the starter/completer.

Here are the typical characteristics of a Steady S

• Reserved - Processing information internally
• People orientated - considering the impact decisions have on everyone
• Supportive
• Sensitive
• Stable
• Great Listeners
• Kind

Imagine you are having a social gathering or team meeting, the Steady S will be the one that arrives with the cake to share with everyone. They will be the one that organises the gifts whether that be for birthdays, anniversaries or leavers. It wouldn't be unusual to hear them say "Sharing is caring". In relationships they will seek harmony and potentially avoid the conflict situation unless they feel capable to use their skills to support a satisfactory resolution for all concerned. 

Their greatest fear is loss of security and change. That isn't to say that they cannot adapt to change, just that you will need to give them sufficient time to process the change and be prepared to discuss the change without judgement.

Imagine you are in a group and someone gets upset, the steady S will be the first to comfort them by putting an arm around them, demonstrating empathy and sympathy, wanting to listen to the problem and seek a solution. They are nurturing with their kind nature and can be viewed as the mother or father in the group. Mother Theresa pops into my head when I think of a Steady S character. 

Questions you may want to ask yourself when dealing with a Steady S leader or coach

• How do they make you feel?
• Do their characteristics help or hinder the situation?
• How can you play to their strengths in the relationship or team?
• How may you have to adapt your communication style to get the best out of them?
• How could these people be an asset and add value to your team?

My top tip for engaging with a Steady S is MAKE ME FEEL SECURE & SHOW ME YOU CARE

If you want to learn more about DISC then I would recommend reading "Do it or Ditch it" By Bev James or "Empowering Employee Engagement - How to ignite your team for peak performance" By Claire Cahill. Both available on Amazon. 

Influencing I leaders and coaches engage you with their story telling. They will create an impression as soon as they walk into the room. They will inspire you with the actions they take and always have others at the heart of all they do.

How to spot an Influential I in the room

• Outgoing
• People Orientated
• Life and soul of a party
• Interactive
• Persuading others
• Talkative
• Love praise and recognition
• Sells ideas to bring the team on board
• Inspirational
• Influential
• Impulsive
• Interested in people

Their greatest fear is loss of popularity so not unusual for them to talk their way out of any situation for fear of rejection. 

When faced with problems I style leaders and coaches become active, verbal and persuasive. They respond actively to challenges and may try to reach an agreement. Great when you are seeking a win/win solution for the team. 

The energy and enthusiasm that is created by an I leader and coach is infectious and it's not unusual for them to have their fingers in every pie and will be juggling the balls. Some people may refer to them as magpies, always going after the shiny objects, however they will always hit a deadline and perform at their best when everything is last minute. (Not a surprise as a high I and wanting to get this blog on my website before the day ends, I'm rapidly typing at the speed of light!)

Questions you may ask yourself when working with an I as a leader or coach

• How does this person make me feel?
• How might these people be an asset to my team?
• How might I have to adapt my communication to get the best out of these people?
• How do I keep these people on track?
• How do I manage their enthusiastic, infectious behaviour?

My top tip to engage with an influencing I is to INVOLVE THEM and MAKE THEM FEEL VALUED

For more information on the influencing I you can read "Do it or Ditch it" by Bev James or "Empowering Employee Engagement - How to ignite your team for peak performance" by Claire Cahill. Both available on Amazon

Inspirational, Fabulous and over 40 is also another great read of 12 women who decided to be brave and courageous to live their dreams by being influential. Also available on Amazon

You can normally spot these people as soon as you walk into a room or feel their presence before you see or hear them. They will ooze confidence which may border on arrogance. They will not shy away from expressing how they feel and typically have a large ego that needs to be stroked. They will want to be in charge, even if they don’t know what they want to be in charge of, so it wouldn’t be unusual to see them in a leadership role.

These individuals would display the following characteristics

• Outgoing
• Task orientated
• Determined to succeed
• Dominant
• Action takers
• Problem solvers
• Respond to challenges aggressively
• Forceable characters
• Direct communication style

 
Imagine you are stood waiting for a lift and the person in front of you consistently pushes the button believing that the more they push the button, the quicker the lift will arrive! There in front of your eyes is a dominant D person. 
 
Failure is their biggest fear so it wouldn’t be an option for them to fail & you may hear them say “this is what I’ve learnt” or “let’s move on and try something else”. They will never stop trying to achieve their hopes, dreams, aspirations or goals and would always want to be the best, encouraging others to do the same. They would want to lead high performing teams and failure for the team would also not be an option for consideration. 
 
When under pressure the dominant D leader and coach may not be sensitive to others feelings and are motivated by results, power and authority.
 
Questions you may ask yourself when interacting with a dominant D leader and coach are: -

• How do these people make you feel?
• How might these people be a great member and asset to your team?
• What value will they add to your team?
• How might you have to adapt your communication style to get the best out of these people?

 
In every team, you need a mix of people so please do not shy away from employing a dominant D or interacting with a dominant D. As I have found out from my client’s, opposites attract and they may be the missing ingredient that you need to build a winning team.
 
My top tip for engaging with a dominant D leader and coach –BE BRIEF, BE BRIGHT, BE GONE. Don’t use 500 words if 5 will do because they don’t need that level of detail to make effective decisions and have valuable conversations. 
 
Thank you to Bev James, CEO of The Coaching Academy for teaching me all I know about DISC. If you want to learn more, you can do so by reading “Do it or ditch it” By Bev James or “Empowering Employee Engagement – How to ignite your team for peak performance” By Claire Cahill. Both books are available on Amazon. 

One of the benefits of coaching is the ability to hold an effective conversation. Knowing what question to ask at the right time and respectfully listening so that rapport can be built and maintained throughout the coaching relationship.

During the first coaching session, I like my clients to complete a DISC personality profile so that I can get to know them in minutes rather than months, tailoring my language to theirs. 

During International Coaching Week 2019 I’ll share information about each personality type.
 

• How would you feel if you could get to know people in minutes rather than months?
• What difference would it make to your business if you could find your ideal client or next employee by observing what they say and noticing how they behave?
• What positive impact would effective communication have on your relationships whether at home or work?

 
Imagine you had this knowledge to answer these questions through identification of personality types.
 
Your core values influence the way you think, act and communicate with other people and enable you to make decisions. DISC is a personality profiling tool, also known as a psychometric test. There are several types of psychometric tests that you may have heard of or experienced
 

• Myers Briggs - I'm ENFP
• Insights - Colours, no surprise I am yellow/red
• Tetra Map - elements - Earth, Air, Fire, Water
• Belbin - Self Perception Inventory and Team Role Inventory
• DISC - I'm ID - The Persuader

 
The modern day DISC methodology was founded on years of research undertaken by American psychologist and inventor Dr William M Marston (1893-1947). Dr Marston also invented the lie detector machine (the polygraph).
 
DISC is an acronym based on four core personality groupings. Everyone will fall into one or more of the following categories.
 

• Dominant
• Influencing
• Steady
• Compliant

 
Marston’s DISC behavioural model classifies people primarily as either TASK ORIENTATED or PEOPLE ORIENTATED, and then as either OUTGOING or RESERVED.
 
Which are you?
There are no correct or incorrect answers, however each will tell you something about your predominant business style and your preferred decision making style.
 
Thank you to Bev James, CEO The Coaching Academy for teaching me all I know about DISC. If you want to learn more read “Do it or Ditch it” by Bev James or “Empowering Employee Engagement – How to ignite your team for peak performance” by Claire Cahill. Both books are available on Amazon  

What I've learnt throughout my coaching and leadership career is, "our health is our wealth" so what can you do to make sure you lead a healthy, happy and wealthy life?

Foresight’s ‘Mental capital and wellbeing’ project considered how to improve everyone’s mental capital and mental wellbeing through life.
Evidence suggests that a small improvement in wellbeing can help to decrease some mental health problems and also help people to flourish. This document, produced by the New Economics Foundation (NEF) on behalf of Foresight, sets out 5 actions to improve personal wellbeing:

• connect
• be active
• take notice
• keep learning
• give

How satisfied are you with your current levels of activity under each of the headings on a scale of 1-10?

What small steps do you need to take each day to improve your current satisfaction levels?

What support do you need and from whom to help you take the small steps forward?

How will you celebrate your success?

What reward will you give yourself for your achievements?

Over the coming weeks I will be sharing with you some ideas on what you could do to improve your current satisfaction levels and also what small steps I have taken to improve my overall health and wellbeing.